Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Military Intelligence
Dear All (yes I know there are less readers than deserve the term "All" with a capital A), in case you're wondering, the lack of new posts is due to the fact that Fore! is in Starlight (a codename for a foreign country) on military exercise and internet connections are damned hard to get here.
I've been in theatre for a classified number of days and will remain here for another classified number of days - which pretty much makes that last sentence entirely useless ... I'm also not allowed to say what I'm here for and who I'm here with.
But fortunately, there is something I can say. Years of personal, often painful & sometimes comical experience (this exercise being merely further confirmation) have taught me the following inviolable Murphy's Laws of Combat:
1. The only 2 states in a soldier's life are Waiting to Rush and then Rushing to Wait.
2. The Enemy's attack assessed to be a feint manoeuvre which we are ignoring will eventually turn out to be their main attack.
3. Every bridge we have will always be 1 metre shorter than the river's width.
4. Covering fire doesn't and counter fire won't.
5. Unlike tanks, infantry have no protection from enemy fire. But tanks will attract more enemy fire than they can protect you from. Therefore it is better to be unprotected and unnoticed than moderately protected and overwhelmingly noticed.
6. Whichever direction you choose to throw the smoke bomb, the wind will always blow it directly back into your face.
7. Air Defence Artillery Motto - Shoot them all down, sort them out on the ground.
8. You don't have to die for your country to become a hero. You can become a hero just by making the enemy die for his country.
9. Tracer bullets work both ways - they allow you to see where you're shooting and they allow the enemy to see where you're shooting from.
And finally, No. 10 - Military Intelligence is an oxymoron.
Dear All (yes I know there are less readers than deserve the term "All" with a capital A), in case you're wondering, the lack of new posts is due to the fact that Fore! is in Starlight (a codename for a foreign country) on military exercise and internet connections are damned hard to get here.
I've been in theatre for a classified number of days and will remain here for another classified number of days - which pretty much makes that last sentence entirely useless ... I'm also not allowed to say what I'm here for and who I'm here with.
But fortunately, there is something I can say. Years of personal, often painful & sometimes comical experience (this exercise being merely further confirmation) have taught me the following inviolable Murphy's Laws of Combat:
1. The only 2 states in a soldier's life are Waiting to Rush and then Rushing to Wait.
2. The Enemy's attack assessed to be a feint manoeuvre which we are ignoring will eventually turn out to be their main attack.
3. Every bridge we have will always be 1 metre shorter than the river's width.
4. Covering fire doesn't and counter fire won't.
5. Unlike tanks, infantry have no protection from enemy fire. But tanks will attract more enemy fire than they can protect you from. Therefore it is better to be unprotected and unnoticed than moderately protected and overwhelmingly noticed.
6. Whichever direction you choose to throw the smoke bomb, the wind will always blow it directly back into your face.
7. Air Defence Artillery Motto - Shoot them all down, sort them out on the ground.
8. You don't have to die for your country to become a hero. You can become a hero just by making the enemy die for his country.
9. Tracer bullets work both ways - they allow you to see where you're shooting and they allow the enemy to see where you're shooting from.
And finally, No. 10 - Military Intelligence is an oxymoron.
