Wednesday, March 21, 2007
The Dead Doctor on my Desk
Q: What's the difference between a rhinoceros and a lawyer?
A: The rhinoceros will stop charging you when you're dead.
People think this is a joke but it's actually true. Scientists have confirmed that rhinos and other wild animals will indeed stop charging at you once they know you're already dead. On the other hand, there is a dead doctor on my desk who is "living" proof that we haven't stopped charging him despite the fact that he died over 17 years ago.
The Doc in question was a very rich man who had no wife or children. That wasn't a problem when he died because he had willed his fortune to his nieces and nephews. The problem was that no one knew the full extent of his fortune and he didn't keep very good records.
We came into the picture when the Executor hired us to help administer the estate. Although we have now distributed all specific legacies and (we believe) most of his residual estate, as late as last year, we find out he had tens of thousands of shares in Fraser & Neave which are worth hundreds of thousands of dollars nowadays! Finds like this are the reason the dead doctor is still sitting on my desk and has been for the better part of a decade now. And of course everytime we do work in finding new assets, liquidating them and transferring the proceeds to the residual beneficiary, we charge for our work done.
The moral of the story? Keep proper records of all your assets so that your lawyers don't keep charging you years after you've become food for worms and fertiliser for daffodils.
And finally, for those of you who don't like a lawyer making fun of a dead doctor on his blog, relax. It's not all one-sided. The following is allegedly part of a transcript from an actual case:
Counsel: Doctor, when you examined the deceased, did you check for a pulse?
Doctor: No.
Counsel: Did you check if the deceased was breathing?
Doctor: No.
Counsel: (Triumphantly) Then how could you be sure he was dead at the time you examined him?
Doctor: Because when I examined his body, his head was sitting in a jar on my desk. But for all I know, he could be out there right now practising law somewhere!
Q: What's the difference between a rhinoceros and a lawyer?
A: The rhinoceros will stop charging you when you're dead.
People think this is a joke but it's actually true. Scientists have confirmed that rhinos and other wild animals will indeed stop charging at you once they know you're already dead. On the other hand, there is a dead doctor on my desk who is "living" proof that we haven't stopped charging him despite the fact that he died over 17 years ago.
The Doc in question was a very rich man who had no wife or children. That wasn't a problem when he died because he had willed his fortune to his nieces and nephews. The problem was that no one knew the full extent of his fortune and he didn't keep very good records.
We came into the picture when the Executor hired us to help administer the estate. Although we have now distributed all specific legacies and (we believe) most of his residual estate, as late as last year, we find out he had tens of thousands of shares in Fraser & Neave which are worth hundreds of thousands of dollars nowadays! Finds like this are the reason the dead doctor is still sitting on my desk and has been for the better part of a decade now. And of course everytime we do work in finding new assets, liquidating them and transferring the proceeds to the residual beneficiary, we charge for our work done.
The moral of the story? Keep proper records of all your assets so that your lawyers don't keep charging you years after you've become food for worms and fertiliser for daffodils.
And finally, for those of you who don't like a lawyer making fun of a dead doctor on his blog, relax. It's not all one-sided. The following is allegedly part of a transcript from an actual case:
Counsel: Doctor, when you examined the deceased, did you check for a pulse?
Doctor: No.
Counsel: Did you check if the deceased was breathing?
Doctor: No.
Counsel: (Triumphantly) Then how could you be sure he was dead at the time you examined him?
Doctor: Because when I examined his body, his head was sitting in a jar on my desk. But for all I know, he could be out there right now practising law somewhere!
# posted by Fore! @ 5:16 PM 
