Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Who Would Bet Against Tiger?
Some weeks ago, my golfing buddies and I were at a Japanese sake bar with some female friends of ours drinking WAY too much sake. The conversation amongst the boys turned to golf (no surprise there huh?) and the impending World Golf Championships CA tournament that was to take place that weekend at the Blue Monster course in the Doral Resort & Spa, Florida. The big question of course is whether Tiger Woods would win it again?
Up to that point, Tiger had an awesome record in WGC tournaments, winning just over 50% of WGC events he had entered. In addition, he had won the last 2 tournaments held at the Blue Monster course. When asked who I thought would win, my obvious and immediate answer was "Tiger."
"Want to bet?", said one of the boys.
"You mean I bet on Tiger and you bet on all the other 70+ players in the field?", I replied and he answered affirmatively.
As much of a Tiger fan as I am and as good as Tiger's record in this event and at this course was, betting on Tiger against all the remaining players didn't exactly seem fair. I can't remember precisely what was said next but the next thing I recall was that he offered to bet on Tiger Woods on 3 to 1 odds for S$10. This means that if Tiger didn't win, he would pay me S$10 but if Tiger won, I would pay him S$30. The odds were to compensate for me having an army of players against his solitary Tiger.
I am a huge Tiger Woods fanatic. A poster of Tiger's swing sequence hangs on my office wall. Tiger's book "How I Play Golf" sits on the coffee table at my apartment. I believe to this day that despite copious amounts of sake that night, I would not have bet against Tiger if it wasn't for an unfortunate coincidence.
At the precise time that bet was offered, 2 of the girls at our table started kissing - each other. Everyone was pretty drunk and I don't know who suggested it but they started kissing with quite some familiarity and passion. It was clearly for fun, just to get a rise out of the boys but there was distinctly tongue involved (sadly, not mine).
It should go without saying that the effect on the minds of heterosexual men when faced with 2 pretty girls kissing each other is like detonating a thermonuclear warhead in Antarctica - all cool rational thought gets burned up in a flash, irreversible and catastrophic global warming occurs and the whole place remains irradiated with the image of what just happened for years to come.
With the 2 girls kissing, in reply to whether I would bet against Tiger, I said "OK" with the most vacuous look on my face. In truth, at that precise moment, I could have been asked whether I would saw my arm off and I would have said "OK". I could have been asked whether I would pledge never to golf again and I would have said "OK". I could even have been asked whether I would support President Bush for life and I would have ... no, wait, nothing could make me that dumb.
Anyway, the point was I took the bet whilst mentally incapacitated. Men only have enough blood to power 1 head at a time and the wrong head was being engaged when I took the bet. I don't know why 2 girls kissing does that. If 2 girls want to kiss each other, that's not evidence they'd enjoy kissing a guy together but for some reason, we always imagine it that way and global warming occurs.
It started out with a glimmer of hope for me - Tiger shot a 1-under 71 in Round 1 and was 4 shots off the lead held by Henrik Stenson. Then in Round 2 he fired a 6-under 66 and took the lead by 2 strokes. Tiger had won 26 times in 32 PGA Tour events where he led at the halfway point. It got even worse for me after Round 3. Tiger shot a 4-under 68 and led the field by 4 strokes. He had won 30 times in 31 PGA Tour events when he led or shared the lead going into the final round. I gave up then and there and paid the bet. Tiger eventually cruised to an easy 2 stroke victory in Round 4.
In all fairness to my friend, he gave me an opportunity to bet on Tiger in last week's Wachovia Championship. It wasn't exactly the same though. This time the field was double the size at 156 players and the bet was for an even S$10. And Tiger had never previously won the Wachovia Championship at Quail Hollow Golf Club. Be that as it may, in the absence of pretty girls kissing each other at the critical moment, I wasn't going to bet against him this time. Tiger duly won by 2 strokes.
The same friend has offered to continue the bet into this week's Players' Championship. When you think about it, it's amazing that we'd bet on 1 player against the entire field of 70+ or 150+ of the world's best golfers. But when you see what he can do, who would bet against Tiger?
Some weeks ago, my golfing buddies and I were at a Japanese sake bar with some female friends of ours drinking WAY too much sake. The conversation amongst the boys turned to golf (no surprise there huh?) and the impending World Golf Championships CA tournament that was to take place that weekend at the Blue Monster course in the Doral Resort & Spa, Florida. The big question of course is whether Tiger Woods would win it again?
Up to that point, Tiger had an awesome record in WGC tournaments, winning just over 50% of WGC events he had entered. In addition, he had won the last 2 tournaments held at the Blue Monster course. When asked who I thought would win, my obvious and immediate answer was "Tiger.""Want to bet?", said one of the boys.
"You mean I bet on Tiger and you bet on all the other 70+ players in the field?", I replied and he answered affirmatively.
As much of a Tiger fan as I am and as good as Tiger's record in this event and at this course was, betting on Tiger against all the remaining players didn't exactly seem fair. I can't remember precisely what was said next but the next thing I recall was that he offered to bet on Tiger Woods on 3 to 1 odds for S$10. This means that if Tiger didn't win, he would pay me S$10 but if Tiger won, I would pay him S$30. The odds were to compensate for me having an army of players against his solitary Tiger.
I am a huge Tiger Woods fanatic. A poster of Tiger's swing sequence hangs on my office wall. Tiger's book "How I Play Golf" sits on the coffee table at my apartment. I believe to this day that despite copious amounts of sake that night, I would not have bet against Tiger if it wasn't for an unfortunate coincidence.
At the precise time that bet was offered, 2 of the girls at our table started kissing - each other. Everyone was pretty drunk and I don't know who suggested it but they started kissing with quite some familiarity and passion. It was clearly for fun, just to get a rise out of the boys but there was distinctly tongue involved (sadly, not mine).
It should go without saying that the effect on the minds of heterosexual men when faced with 2 pretty girls kissing each other is like detonating a thermonuclear warhead in Antarctica - all cool rational thought gets burned up in a flash, irreversible and catastrophic global warming occurs and the whole place remains irradiated with the image of what just happened for years to come.With the 2 girls kissing, in reply to whether I would bet against Tiger, I said "OK" with the most vacuous look on my face. In truth, at that precise moment, I could have been asked whether I would saw my arm off and I would have said "OK". I could have been asked whether I would pledge never to golf again and I would have said "OK". I could even have been asked whether I would support President Bush for life and I would have ... no, wait, nothing could make me that dumb.
Anyway, the point was I took the bet whilst mentally incapacitated. Men only have enough blood to power 1 head at a time and the wrong head was being engaged when I took the bet. I don't know why 2 girls kissing does that. If 2 girls want to kiss each other, that's not evidence they'd enjoy kissing a guy together but for some reason, we always imagine it that way and global warming occurs.
It started out with a glimmer of hope for me - Tiger shot a 1-under 71 in Round 1 and was 4 shots off the lead held by Henrik Stenson. Then in Round 2 he fired a 6-under 66 and took the lead by 2 strokes. Tiger had won 26 times in 32 PGA Tour events where he led at the halfway point. It got even worse for me after Round 3. Tiger shot a 4-under 68 and led the field by 4 strokes. He had won 30 times in 31 PGA Tour events when he led or shared the lead going into the final round. I gave up then and there and paid the bet. Tiger eventually cruised to an easy 2 stroke victory in Round 4.In all fairness to my friend, he gave me an opportunity to bet on Tiger in last week's Wachovia Championship. It wasn't exactly the same though. This time the field was double the size at 156 players and the bet was for an even S$10. And Tiger had never previously won the Wachovia Championship at Quail Hollow Golf Club. Be that as it may, in the absence of pretty girls kissing each other at the critical moment, I wasn't going to bet against him this time. Tiger duly won by 2 strokes.
The same friend has offered to continue the bet into this week's Players' Championship. When you think about it, it's amazing that we'd bet on 1 player against the entire field of 70+ or 150+ of the world's best golfers. But when you see what he can do, who would bet against Tiger?
# posted by Fore! @ 2:12 PM 
