Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Horrorscope for the Week of 25th June
Soon, people will be breaking down your door to get your secret to happiness. Mostly because your secret to happiness is 85 kilos of uncut Bolivian cocaine.
Soon, people will be breaking down your door to get your secret to happiness. Mostly because your secret to happiness is 85 kilos of uncut Bolivian cocaine.
Labels: Horrorscope
Horrorscope for the Week of 18th June
You'll be knifed in the throat during an argument over which Mötley Crüe album is the most indispensable, leaving you as dead as you are wrong.
You'll be knifed in the throat during an argument over which Mötley Crüe album is the most indispensable, leaving you as dead as you are wrong.
Labels: Horrorscope
Monday, June 18, 2007
One Out of Every Three
"We delivered the letter", said my Associate. It was 9pm and he had just returned from an errand to deliver a letter to the woman who had been harassing my client with incessant telephone calls, smses and emails.
"Good! Any trouble?", I replied. The client had told her he would meet her at the lobby of an office building but he didn't show up. Instead, it was just a ruse to get her there so that we could serve the letter on her. As you might guess, the letter just told her to leave our client alone, or else ...
"No trouble. She was confused and then annoyed but it was otherwise ok", replied the Associate.
"Good! Thanks", I said and returned to reading the documents on my desk, expecting the Associate to leave my room.
"By the way, she's hot!" said the Associate and smiled at me.
"Really? It's a good thing I didn't meet her then or I might have been put in a position of serious conflict of interest!" I was joking of course.
"Yeah really", said the Associate, "in fact, this is the third hot girl I've met today!", he said, really pleased with himself.
"Who were the other two?"
"Well, the first was another junior Associate at another law firm. I was later told by someone that she appeared in Maxim magazine recently. The second was the Subordinate Courts Deputy Registrar I appeared before for a small application this morning and then now this girl I just delivered the letter to!"
I sat back and thought about it for a bit and said to him, "Do you know what this shows?"
"No ..."
"It shows that for every three girls you meet, one will be too hot for you, one will be too smart for you and one will be too nuts for you", I explained. "And do you know what the consequence of that is?"
This time he was determined to figure out the answer, "It means I'm better off not meeting any hot girls and I should just stay in the office and work?"
He learns fast. I think he'll do well in the firm.
"We delivered the letter", said my Associate. It was 9pm and he had just returned from an errand to deliver a letter to the woman who had been harassing my client with incessant telephone calls, smses and emails.
"Good! Any trouble?", I replied. The client had told her he would meet her at the lobby of an office building but he didn't show up. Instead, it was just a ruse to get her there so that we could serve the letter on her. As you might guess, the letter just told her to leave our client alone, or else ...
"No trouble. She was confused and then annoyed but it was otherwise ok", replied the Associate.
"Good! Thanks", I said and returned to reading the documents on my desk, expecting the Associate to leave my room.
"By the way, she's hot!" said the Associate and smiled at me.
"Really? It's a good thing I didn't meet her then or I might have been put in a position of serious conflict of interest!" I was joking of course.
"Yeah really", said the Associate, "in fact, this is the third hot girl I've met today!", he said, really pleased with himself.
"Who were the other two?"
"Well, the first was another junior Associate at another law firm. I was later told by someone that she appeared in Maxim magazine recently. The second was the Subordinate Courts Deputy Registrar I appeared before for a small application this morning and then now this girl I just delivered the letter to!"
I sat back and thought about it for a bit and said to him, "Do you know what this shows?"
"No ..."
"It shows that for every three girls you meet, one will be too hot for you, one will be too smart for you and one will be too nuts for you", I explained. "And do you know what the consequence of that is?"
This time he was determined to figure out the answer, "It means I'm better off not meeting any hot girls and I should just stay in the office and work?"
He learns fast. I think he'll do well in the firm.
Monday, June 11, 2007
Horrorscope for the Week of 11th June
Once again, it's a rotten week for romance in the office, which is particularly harsh if you’re self-employed and work from home.
Once again, it's a rotten week for romance in the office, which is particularly harsh if you’re self-employed and work from home.
Labels: Horrorscope
Horrorscope for the Week of 4th June
It’s true that sometimes all one can do is step back and laugh at the absurdity of it all. Nevertheless, the jury will insist on noting that a fire extinguisher was within your easy reach.
It’s true that sometimes all one can do is step back and laugh at the absurdity of it all. Nevertheless, the jury will insist on noting that a fire extinguisher was within your easy reach.
Labels: Horrorscope
Friday, June 01, 2007
Horrorscope for the Week of 28th May
Satan will appear before you, transport you to a mountaintop, show you the riches of the world, and then just leave you up there without food or shelter.
Satan will appear before you, transport you to a mountaintop, show you the riches of the world, and then just leave you up there without food or shelter.
Labels: Horrorscope
